Hello and welcome!

This blog has no fixed ‘subject matter’; I like to ramble and will blog about whatever takes my fancy.

I am currently addicted to YouTube beauty bloggers; however when I am done I feel like I have binged on a 1000 tonnes of Ben and Jerry’s.Β  It felt good at the time but now I feel fat, guilty, uglyΒ  and just urghhhhhhhhhhh.

I am fat and over forty.Β  I have wrinkles.Β  I follow the tutorials and look like a bloody clown.

So I thought “Eureka! |Mouse! Do it yourself!!!”

Hmmm yep, one major problem though….. There is no way I am putting my mush on CAMERA ….Oh no,not gonna happen.Β  I would become a YouTube sensation for ALL the wrong reasons. Not thin, not 20, not flawless, definitely not a make up artist and my accent……….nope the Vlogger world is not for me.

The other thing is, I sit there watching and thinking ‘oh that looks so easy, that product is amazing’.Β  Then common sense kicks in and I am not so sure……..So here, in my little mouse hole,Β  I am testing products I have bought myself and I will tell you what I really think.

So if you too feel fat, forty, wrinkly and just plain old blurgh and would just rather read a middle-aged ramblings about all things beauty, then come join me.Β  I may one day reveal my videoed self (about June 2018 if I actually start and stick to a diet on Jan 1st) but for now I’ll be a little shy Mouse.

NB: whatever I say on this site are my own personal opinionsΒ  blah blah.Β  I am not affiliated to any brand. (Although I could be bought for a bag full of Benefit products #justsaying)



I decided to do the 50 interesting facts, but I don’t think there are 50 but I will give it a go

  1. I am 45 and hate it
  2. I have 3 kids – mostly grown
  3. I had 3 dogs but lost one last week – god bless and RIP little lady
  4. My other two are a black lab and a Heinz 57 and i love them dearly
  5. I cannot put on eyeliner
  6. I cannot stop eyeliner smudging
  7. I am adopted
  8. Originally from Ireland
  9. Adopted in England
  10. Have been through the adoption ‘finding’ process; it a whole blog on its own if i could be bothered to write it.Β  I can’t be bothered.
  11. I secretly eat jars of peanut butter
  12. i cant eat food that is touching
  13. i cannot eat a burger as it should be eaten; i have to eat it layer by layer
  14. i have food OCD – see above
  15. i sort midget gems into colours before i can eat them see above
  16. i am a make up whore
  17. i can go a full weekend and not get dressed
  18. i love black and white films
  19. i love christmas films
  20. i love christmas
  21. my other half looks like Delboy off Only Fools and Horses
  22. My other half thinks he is Delboy off Only Fools and Horses
  23. My other half would try to sell you a watch – see above
  24. I am addicted to playing Hay Day
  25. I am addicted to The Real Housewives of anywhere
  26. I want to be a real housewife
  27. Well no, i want to shop as if i was a Real Housewife
  28. I want Botox
  29. And a Nose Job
  30. And a Boob Job
  31. and Lipo
  32. In fact i want a whole body lift
  33. I secretly dance around my kitchen to The Nolans
  34. I dance around my kitchen to The Nolans – not in secret, when i am drunk
  35. When i am drunk i think i am best singer in the world
  36. I am not the best singer in the world
  37. i cant sing
  38. I can’t type capital Is
  39. I am a Game of Thrones nerd
  40. I only found out eyeshadow came in palettes about 2 months ago when I saw them on YouTube – before that they were just eyeshadow
  41. I can’t style my hair
  42. I am scared of hairdressers
  43. I have hair to my arse – see above
  44. I like tequila
  45. I like wine
  46. I like alcohol
  47. Alcohol doesn’t like me
  48. When i win the lottery i will have a counter of every make up brand installed in my house so my bedroom looks like debenhams
  49. I will give the rest to charity – i am not that shallow
  50. Actually I will give a quarter of the rest to charity because i am more shallow than i thought and i want a pair of UGGS in every colour and style too

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